Tag Archives: abyss

The Only Way Out is Through

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For a warrior, to be harmonious is to flow, not to stop in the middle of the current and try to make a space of artificial and impossible peace. He knows that he can only give the very best of himself under conditions of maximum tension. For that reason, he seeks out his opponent the way a fighting rooster does – with avidity, with delight, knowing that the next step is decisive. His opponent is not his fellow man, but his own attachments and weaknesses, and his grand challenge is to compress the layers of his energy until they won’t expand when his life ceases, so that his awareness does not die.– Carlos Castaneda, Encounters with the Nagual

I always love a good epiphany. That moment when you stare into the abyss and find it staring back at you. The flash of illumination that reminds you that everything is okay and that life will continue to go forward with or without your consent or approval. Such a realization happened the other day when I was walking along the river. I was reflecting upon all of the anger that I’ve had for the past year in the face of what seems like insurmountable global issues that affect us all, many of which I’ve written about. I watched the calm water move with fluidity over rocks, creating little eddies in the shallows, and random fish jumping up creating beautiful ripples across the surface.

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Vanquishing the Self

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In order to be a dreamer I had to vanquish the self. Nothing, but nothing, is as hard as that. The sorcerers understand freedom as the capacity to do the impossible, the unexpected – to dream a dream that has no basis, no reality in everyday life. The knowledge of sorcerers is what is exciting and new. Imagination is what a woman needs to change the self and become a dreamer. ~ Florinda Donner, Being-in-Dreaming

At some point on the path of the committed warrior it becomes necessary to deepen by shifting the assemblage point as thoroughly as possible to align with the unfathomable sea of awareness. This is more than a decision to change a routine, recapitulate a thing or break a pattern. It is a commitment to align with intent as much as possible and jump into the abyss, feet first, without looking back. In order to jump it is necessary to prepare by pooling all accessible energy and engage in the act of not-doing as much as possible.

The warrior strives to become capable of what don Juan refers to as stupendous maneuvers of perception, and in preparing for this it is necessary to vanquish the self and gain deeper access to dreaming. In order to begin to explore from a new point of perception everything has to change. The hardest decision for me was letting go of the blog and recapitulating all of it because the lines within the internet began to overwhelm me and it felt as though the lines of information I was putting forth were gathering up other lines and coming right back through the screen, through my fingertips and into me. This subtle and nearly imperceptible occurrence was beginning to fixate my assemblage point and it was time to unplug and focus on fluidity.

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