I shifted my eyes so I would see his personal life disintegrating, expanding uncontrollably beyond its limits, like a fog of crystals, because that is the way life and death mix and expand. That is what I did at the time of my son’s death. That’s all one could ever do, and that is controlled folly. Had I looked at him I would have watched him becoming immobile and I would have felt a cry inside of me, because never again would I look at his fine figure pacing the earth. I saw his death instead, and there was no sadness, no feeling. His death was equal to everything else.” ~ Don Juan, A Separate Reality
I did not understand this statement of Don Juan’s until July 2, 2017 as I witnessed cancer, the ultimate predator, steal my husband’s 53 years-young exuberant life causing him to cease to exist. I knelt beside him holding his hands and said, “merge with cosmic consciousness,” as he took his last breath and I felt his energy retreating inwards, as in a vacuum, until it was all within him, at the center of consciousness within himself. And then he was gone. And so was all of his energy. The bedroom was quiet, so incredibly noiseless and still. I looked at our very good friend who sat there with me and I said, “He did it. He took all of his energy with him and left with utter efficiency.” He replied, “Yes, he most certainly did.”
We sat there for a few minutes uncomprehendingly trying to comprehend what had just occurred. And then there was a strange otherworldly cry. Three of us in the house all heard a different thing. One heard a child, one a woman, and I heard a man. We all heard it coming from different points of origin. I heard it come from the back yard; one heard it in the front yard, and one in the garage. We do not know what it was. Maybe it was a pack of coyotes, circling the perimeter while energetically connecting to this ethereal event. An ally perhaps, helping to guide him safely to infinity? Inorganic beings? A welcoming committee?
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Patterns are maintained by consistently giving energy to a system of power. I choose freedom from the routines, from the patterns, from the human collective. My life is about walking each moment in full awareness, forever touching it, honing it and knowing it through the grandeur that is our existence here upon this earth. – Becoming Awareness
My book received a really cool book review, with this accompanying image from Carlos Castaneda’s book, The Fire From Within, and I want to share it here. It’s been so interesting to receive feedback about the book and I appreciate the time that has been taken by those who have left Amazon book reviews and/or contacted me with personal insights from the readers’ perspective.